That is how our morning started today. You see, my alarm goes off at 5:30, but I usually don’t get out of bed right away. I like the snooze button. I even set the alarm it a little bit early so I can hit it. This morning however I hit it and hit it, and finally woke up enough to realize it was going off at exactly 6:20.
I guess Master was tired too, because his response to this declaration was, “mph” and then he rolled over. By 6:20 I am running late. This is because I have to put on “professional” clothes every day and do hair and make up. The receptionists life is so glamarous! I leave the house by 7:00 am. So what I needed to do was jump out of bed and get moving. But, I had a problem. I was chained to the bed. That’s actually the reason I informed Master about the time. He doesn’t have to get up (since he doesn’t work until 9:00) but he does have to unchain me.
I’ve never paid much attention to where he keeps his key, but apparently it lives on top of his alarm clock. I learned this because when I said, “Sir please unchain me…” he said, “Oh.. HOW DID MY ALARM CLOCK GET KNOCKED OVER?” I don’t know Sir. “Hold on” Well, ok. Not like I’m going anywhere.
Master proceeded to roll over and search around on his night stand. He swore. I got nervous. Next he left the room entirely and came back with a flash light. He shone the flashlight down along the side of the bed, behind the night stand. He swore again, and left again.
At this point I started thinking of excuses to tell my boss about why I was late. But, just then Master came in with a key. Apparently we have a spare. Smart man! I have no idea what happened to the other key, but I hope he finds it.
I still haven’t come up with that excuse!
Uuuuuum, is being chained to the bed a recent development? Does it happen every night? What part of you is attached to the chain, and how (does it attach to your collar like a leash, or to an ankle or wrist cuff, or around your waist)? What happens if nature calls, or the house catches on fire, or a child cries in the night, or for some other reason you need to get out of bed — do you have to wake him? Is this chaining “real” (you actually couldn’t get out of it by yourself even if you needed to) or symbolic (you could get out in a minute or two, with a bit of effort, but you’re not supposed to, so you don’t unless it’s an actual emergency)?
Hmm, your post seems to have raised quite a few questions in my mind.
Comment by Michael — August 24, 2009 @ 10:31 PM
Michael, it’s a semi new thing. It’s been happening for the last few months, sometime after CC and Master went separate ways. Though, he’s always used chains periodically throughout our relationship.
We only use it when we don’t have kids (every other week). It goes around my neck and locks like a collar. It can be easily removed with a key which he keeps on his night stand. I don’t know exactly where but could find it if I really needed to.
It used to be long enough to reach to the bathroom until we moved the bed. However I rarely have to get up in the night. If I did I would wake up Master.
Did I get everything? If not let me know
Comment by youngbridget — August 25, 2009 @ 2:27 PM
Thank you for your complete reply; yes, you got everything, however, predictably, I have follow-up questions/comments.
During the school year do you have the kids only on weekends, or did you work out a way for them to attend school near CC’s new house while spending the night with you? (This refers back to two earlier posts. On 8/12 you were sad because you’d only have the kids weekends. On 8/18 you wrote “I didn’t get my way with that battle either. … They will go to school by CC but use public transit … to get between our two locations and school,” which sounds like you DID win PART of the battle, if they are still alternating weeks.)
The only way that’s relevant to the chain is, if they are there 4 nights out of 14 instead of 7, you can be chained more.
Have you learned to sleep with a chain around your neck? Do you ever roll over and wrap it around you wrong and wake up because you can’t breathe?
If you can find the key if you need it, it sounds like you are doing better than he did the other morning (when he had to fetch the spare).
Comment by Michael — August 25, 2009 @ 10:56 PM
Thank goodness for spare keys, lol.
Comment by Dante d'Amore — August 25, 2009 @ 11:27 PM
As to the excuse: “Sorry I’m late. Gosh it was hard to get up this morning. I felt like I was chained to the bed!”
I’m glad there’s a spare key. Maybe you can give him a dogtaggish chain and he can keep the key ’round his neck.
Comment by Mija — August 26, 2009 @ 7:25 PM
Mija said:
As to the excuse: “Sorry I’m late. Gosh it was hard to get up this morning. I felt like I was chained to the bed!”
Now THAT’S funny.
Comment by Michael — August 26, 2009 @ 9:11 PM
Michael,
We still have kids every other week, assuming they can figure out public transportation. We are still working with them on this, but it seems to be going ok. They started school this week. If the bus thing turns out not to be viable, then we will have to re evaluate what our time with them looks like. After all, it’s not really best for the kids for them to spend all evening being shuffled around and then sent to bed after dinner. But for right now, that’s not the plan.
It never chokes me at night. He leaves it plenty loose enough around my neck, and it’s a very long chain attached to the foot of the bed. gravity keeps it from wrapping around my neck or cutting off breathing. The only thing that makes it hard to sleep with is that it is very very cold. brrr.
He doesn’t normally knock over his alarm clock and spill half the contents of his night stand down behind it. I consider that an anomaly.
Comment by youngbridget — August 27, 2009 @ 7:00 AM
Would you be allowed to wrap a scarf around the chain?
Comment by Billy — August 27, 2009 @ 8:23 AM
No Billy, I just keep the chain outside of my blankets.
Comment by youngbridget — August 27, 2009 @ 10:16 AM
You two are so interesting and fun
happy for you
Comment by H.M. — September 22, 2009 @ 3:39 PM